Pieces of our Hearts

How does a child come to occupy a part of your heart in such a short amount of time? The only explanation I can come up with is that God did it. He made us and prepares us...not only with the ability to love more than we do already, but in His Sovereignty, He brings souls into our lives.

The question we'd asked ourselves when we first considered hosting our 2 kids was:  "can we show them what a family is?"  That is exactly what they become to each of us.   It wasn't like just having a couple guests in our home. We ate together, did chores together, read the Bible together (then translated it using Google Translate 😏), sang together, prayed together, learned together, played together, went places together.

We did everything with them....so now, everything reminds us of them... which  can trigger both joy and sorrow at a moments notice. The bike sitting outside, the trampoline they loved, the empty beds, the too quiet mornings (because they aren't up early), the chickens he loved to take care of, the Nabi that she loved to listen to songs on, the places we went together.

Its hard to go to the store without remembering...."Store Mommy? Me you? Please store?" The weekend after they left, I had to go Walmart, which reminded me of both of them. And guess who waited on me? The man who waited on us on V's birthday (whom she asked me to make sure he knew it was her special day).

Oh and the STUFF they left behind that keeps showing up in the wash ;) His jeans. Her pajamas. Gets me every time! I won't lie--its tough! Its been harder than I thought it would be. But it all just shows how integrated they were into our lives! And what a blessing it was that God gave us this love for each other.

At first I thought of all the things I wish I'd done with them while they were here. I wished I'd watched The Jesus Movie in Russian with them early on (we didn't get to finish it). We ran out of time to go bowling or go to my parent's home. I wish I'd spent more time alone with each.

But then again, wow!  We did alot-- between Christmas and two birthdays, the pool, church, the store, park, rollerskating... It all went so fast .

What I really miss and desire the most is just to have them here, eating at our table and sitting on our couches for family time, singing with and playing games with them, hugging them goodnight and saying "I love you."  Just being a part of our family. So that is what we are working on with adoption.

 We are just tackling each new step in the process..... One application and document after another, filling out our past addresses since birth for the 6th time, making doctor appointments, finding birth certificates, making copies, going to the Notary, going again, going to the Post Office, going again, getting passports renewed. Each is getting us one step further.

We are so thankful we have had some communication with our boy... but its not much and we've yet to talk to our girl.  :(   Seeing their photos from the facilitator who visited them, hearing they are doing well but missing us and that they are excited about the adoption....these things keep me going! So does hearing an encouraging word from another adoptive parent, or a comment from a friend who is excited or praying for us. It will be worth it and it will come. Even when it feels never ending. Even when there seems to be one expense after another.  God's got this. 

The hardest part of all this is knowing how LONG adoption takes.  How do you explain that to children who have waited so long? Especially if Google translate changes your words and often doesn't come out right?  We are trying to do everything we can to go as quickly as possible. Its all we can do for them right now besides the most important thing, which is to pray.

If you'd like to know some ways to pray for us, please join us in praying that:

* the adoption process will go smoothly and quickly for their sakes. We are praying also for whats best for their siblings (who we are not sure yet if they can be adopted, or if the older brother wants to be adopted--we very well may be his last change since on his birthday he will no longer be able)  It will take a miracle to get there in time! 

* they could be here for the Summer! We'd planned to host them again but are praying that perhaps our adoption could enable them to be home for good for the summer.

* God will continue to provide the funds needed  and open doors for adoption

* God will protect them and keep their hearts full of love and hope during this waiting process.

* our family to balance adoption with every day life & to trust & rest in God!
* for peace in their country

By the way, if you haven't seen this already my husband set up a page where folks can donate. Thank you to all who have already donated....we are so encouraged!

Here is the sponsor page:
https://www.youcaring.com/johnandtraciadamson-1084800

We WILL be starting fundraisers soon... I hope, once the craziness of Homestudy forms/visits, doctor appointments  and everything else settles down a bit.
If you have ideas, or things you have done in the past, please message us! 

Please feel free to share this...thank you!! :)

Blessings,

Traci